When have we become so conditioned by modern society to believe that the qualities required to be successful, fulfilled, happy, beautiful, healthy, loveable and desirable fits into a very narrow box with a very narrow opening. Entry into this very narrow box is exclusive and even though most of us know how futile it is to attempt entry, qualifying with the most elusive attributes, we still strive to achieve this goal over a life time.
So what does it mean to be successful? What does it mean to fail? Sometimes it seams that success and failure are one dimensional words with a commonly agreed definition. When have we lost touch with our selves to see through this charade? We are so incredibly hard on ourselves that we stubbornly hold onto this fictional idea of success. How often have you failed, found yourself on the hard ground with nothing left to hold on to? Who did you blame? Yourself, circumstances or others. But what if there was no one to blame. What if we just accept things as they are?
So you have failed. At work, in your relationship, with your diet, with a fleeting new years resolution. No matter how big or small the ‘failure’, you have been beating yourself up over it. You should have done better, why can’t you be more disciplined, you are useless, blah, blah, blah. Yes, its bad enough you did’t get to where you were hoping to get, but now you are also making yourself feel so very small for it. It should not be like this!
It should be exactly like this and nothing more. You have done your best and the only way to go from here is forwards (since you clearly can’t go back in time). And in going forwards, you go with a new experience and with new hope. And the best you can do each day is to do your best.
Oh, how many times have I failed and spend months licking my wounds, gone over the should and should nots. Did it help? No, just wasted time in self denial. Denial of the Self.
So the same goes with beauty and personality. Certain ‘looks’ and traits appear to be more desirable. Says who? We say this to our Selves daily. ” I should be more like this and less like that. I should smile more, eat less, be more gregarious and taller”. How so very very tiring, isn’t it? How about looking less in the mirror and more at nature. Nature has not got any of our worries and wants. It just is. Beautiful and perfect and successful.
So, where am I getting with this speech? A bit of self talk and to tell you to love yourself more, to just be the way you are. Less striving for the image of success that others have prescribe, but go for your very own brand of success.
Today, my success has been getting the kids off to school with a delicious lunch (which will probably come back uneaten). Break up a fight between the boys with calm and strength. My success today has been to catch my negative chatter as I looked in the mirror. I caught my critical eye and stopped in the tracks. I stopped to instead list all the things I Iove about myself and am grateful for. And I am also grateful for my hot headed boys who help me become more conscious. Because their cuddles and kissed at the end of the day far outweigh the harsh words, fussiness and defiance.
I am learning to be grateful for what I have right now as it is so much better that to follow an elusive dream that I did not dream up.
So will you do that to?
But what delicious school lunch I hear you ask? Well, hold on to your seats, cause I have outdone myself today….but to tell you the truth, the kids would have been equally happy with a cheese toasty. But as you may now, I am catering also for a fusspot with a very restricted diet, so I am trying to get as much nutrition into a packed lunch that hopefully will be eaten.
Lets start with morning tea….
Indian spiced nuts
- 500g mixed nuts and seeds (I used almonds, brazil, pecans, sunflower and pepitas)
- 1 egg white
- 1 tsp ground cumin
- 1 tsp garam masala
- 1 tsp chilli flakes
- 1 tsp dried garlic
- 2 tsp sea salt
- 1/2 tsp turmeric
Beat the egg white till its stiff. Add and mix in all the spices. Toss the nuts in the spice mix till evenly covered.
Bake for 15min on 150C, turn and break up any clumps and bake for another 10 min on 120C. Let it cool down a bit and try not to eat them all at once.
At the last minute I decided not to make cheese toasties but go for Soba Noodle Salad. A big jump, we’ll see how that goes.
Buckwheat Soba Noodle Salad
- 1 packet of Soba Noodles
- raw veggies like snow peas, capsicum and spinach (add what ever tickles your fancy)
- 1 tsp white miso
- 3 tbs wheat free tamari
- 1 tbs rice wine vinegar
- 1 tbs ginger
- 4 tbs water
- 1 tsp sesame oil
- 1 tsp coconut sugar or malt syrup or coconut syrup
- toasted sesame seeds
But all of the dressing ingredients into a glass jar with a lid and shake till the miso is well blended in.
Cook the noodles according to the packet. Make sure you do the whole thing with topping up the boiling water with a cup of cold water thingy, as it really makes a difference (I never did until recently). When cooked, cool immediately under cold water.
Toss and blend and mix it all up and add whatever you fee like. You could also add cold chicken, tofu, spring onions…I added one chicken meatball from last nights dinner. The dressing is really tasty, but you could also add a bit of chilli.
I also added a gluten/sugar/dairy free tahini biscuit to the lunch box, along with some raw veg and a couple of strawberries. Will tell you more about the biscuit next time….
I am fasting today, so hence my raw and personal message. Other that, I am happily dreaming up things to cook and will be having left over noodles for my lunch tomorrow. Hurray!!
Be well and be kind.